Monday, March 22, 2010

"Look, I don't know about you, but things have really sucked for me lately, and I could really use a victory. So let's get one, dude!"

On Saturday night, we ate crackers for dinner. No, really. Multi-grain saltines out of the bag. . .

We were in the midst of working on a paper for M’s class and just didn’t have the time to stop for something more substantial. We worked around a fussy baby and when he was finally in bed, we worked some more. Then, around 11 pm, we had a cereal break. Because crackers can only last so long, you know.

We worked until nearly midnight. By the time we were too exhausted to continue, we had 7 pages of typed text and just had to cover one more topic and write a conclusion, then we were done. As I closed the laptop, I estimated it would take us only “another hour” to finish up. And then, the closing “click” of the MacBook sealed our fate.

On Sunday, I awoke with a headache and a neck ache. And a stuffy nose. And a strong desire to stay in bed. Instead, I went to church for the first hour, then came home. The baby was asleep in his car seat and, not wanting to waste the precious quiet time, I rallied my weak energy to take a look at the paper we had labored over the night before.

As I scrolled down. . .

Hmmmm. . .

That’s not it. That’s a skeleton I used when we first started. What the. . .

I looked everywhere.

G-O-N-E. Gone. All that hard won text. Gone.

I began to panic. I began to pray. “This is what you get for coming home from church early” nagged by brain. “Shut up!” I told it “and help me look for this paper!” Then I began to cry.

The baby woke up, tapping his car seat buckles with his wild little hands. I tried to compose myself and put on my Happy Mommy face for him, but I was too worried. I picked him up and went to the changing table, praying in whispers as I went along. . . “please, please, please let me find the version I saved as we went along. . . please?” I laid him on the changing pad. . .

Then, I did what any sickly, panicky, overly tired, overstressed human adult faced with the challenge of starting all that work over would do.

I fell on the floor and cried. Sobbed! Bawled. Like a baby.

All the while, the real baby of the house kicked his feet and made little noises atop the changing station, happy as a lark to be alive and well rested.

If only. . .

[Title quote is from "Lost" (TV)]

1 comment:

Danielle said...

That sucks. That happened to Caleb's final project- the one that determined whether or not he graduated from college! I think we ended up downloading some program that recovered any and all lost files so he managed to get most of it back. But for one small moment, I think Caleb debated whether or not starting over on that project was even worth graduating. Hope you recover that file!

 
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