“Can we in fact pretend that she is anything other than a woman scorned, like which fury Hell hath no? We cannot.”

Our August trip to L.A. was whirlwind to be sure, but it was a great weekend and we did so much for only being there for 24 hours.

It was wonderful.

All except for my run in with the Getty nazis.

We went to the world renowned Getty Center. OK. I don't know if it's really "world" renowned (although there were a lot of people there from other countries), but it's certainly "western U.S." renowned. We had been there once before and suggested it as an activity for the family to do since no one else had ever been there.

When you get to the Getty, you pay for parking and park in an underground parking structure. That parking ticket is the only payment you make to get in. The rest is free. Which cost, of course, makes for a lovely way to spend a Saturday afternoon with your husband's family while visiting L.A. for a brother-in-law's wedding reception.

After parking, you take this tram up the hill to the Getty. Everyone was duly curious about how on earth the tram worked. Was it electric? Was it solar? Was it pullies?

I took it upon myself to lean over the railing pictured above to check it out. You know, just so I could do research on the thing that everyone was dying to know. All of the sudden I hear "Ma'am! Ma'am!" I turn to see a uniformed woman rushing toward me and hear her saying "please stand behind the gray tiles. The gray tiles! Please stay behind them!" Having already gathered the recon that I needed, I went on my merry way to the bathroom.

My Pop thought it would be great to take a pic next to this naked lady statue on the way in to the Getty. He went one step up and settled in for his pose when all who were watching the picture be taken suddenly heard an as-yet formless voice saying "Sir! Sir! Please get off the steps! Please get down now!"
We continued to make our way, motley crew that we were, through various and sundry parts of the large Getty Center. We meandered through the paths of the garden, making our way down and around the small stream flowing straight through. It was all quite stunning actually. We reached the bottom, where we sat in circles (why do people do that?) and talked while Rick shared snacks with us. We got up to leave and I went over to the exposed part of the stream and looked over. Two people next to us were stepping onto the flattened stone surface of the man-made stream. I almost did the same, but turned to a family member and said "uh oh! Getty nazi alert! They're going to get in trouble!" Sure enough, not two seconds later, I hear "Sir! Ma'am! Please step back up on the the path! Don't get in the water!"

The straw that broke the proverbial tourist's back that day was when we went into the Peruvian exhibit. It was all very cool to try and decipher ancient Peruvian writings and look at the art, etc. I was tired, though, and thinking hard. I leaned and rested my elbow on the plexiglass exhibit case, in a harmless, conversational sort of way, to talk to my brother in law. Ma whispered a word of warning. Too late. A Getty nazi came rushing forth from his corner saying "Ma'am! Ma'am! Please do not lean on the case! Please don't touch it!" I said "You've gotta be kidding me!" I left the proximity of the case and returned a few minutes later to listen to my BIL read some more Peruvian writings. Accidental Lean. "Ma'am! Please!"

I left that exhibit out of pure frustration, mumbling something under my breath about the stupid display not even being breakable, and if you're worried about fingerprints, clean the stupid thing!! Which rant I succinctly repeated to every family member who would tolerate it.

Turns out, free is not always better, despite the fantastic memories of that place first etched in my mind 4 or 5 years ago. Stupid Getty nazis had to go and ruin it for me!

[Title quote is from "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End"]