Monday, July 12, 2010

"I don't exist."

What, you ask, have I been up to during my absence? Behold, a series of vignettes. . .

Vignette the first: Crying babies make me cry. Two babies. One cries big, tired crocodile tears. Then mine cries, all low-moaning and despair. The sadness of it all makes me cry. Lesson here? Sometimes, we all just need a good cry.

Vignette the second: Eating dinner at the table as a family makes me feel like a grown up.

Vignette the third: Parenting and habitual drinking (even "only on the weekends") don’t mix. I have really serious problems with people who think it does. So much so that I may be unfriending on FB just to avoid seeing those #$*&^-ing status updates. For serious.

Vignette the fourth: I have a crap ton of bruises for no apparent - or memorable - reason. I have renewed my vitamin consumption, which I'm hoping will also help my summer doldrums/headaches.

Vignette the fifth: Wearing my Moby wrap at the mall makes me feel like a rock star! Everywhere I go it's all "did you see that!?" "Cool!"

Vignette the sixth: I miss my paper journal. It might be time to make a return to the land of thoughts via paper and pen. Which means I may or may not be back here more often.

Vignette the seventh: Any self-esteem issues - mommy or otherwise - have pretty much resolved themselves. As it turns out, I'm pretty great.

Vignette the eighth: Sometimes not being where you’re “supposed to be” is exactly where you’re supposed to be!

Vignette the ninth: M’s father’s day present (he bought himself): $$$$; My mother’s day present (I bought myself): $$$; Knowing he owes me one? Priceless!

Vignette the tenth: Sometimes, during a craptastic week, when both you and your spouse are doing everything you can muster and it's still not enough, you might find yourself lying on a blanket in the middle of your living room floor and saying "Partner, I just need to know that you know and appreciate that sometimes I struggle under the weight of all this and that it's not easy." And he'll say "I know. I appreciate." And you will say "Thank you. That's all I need."

[Title quote is from "Spanglish"]

2 comments:

Danielle said...

You are great!!

Nichole said...

Thanks Danielle!!

p.s. my FB friends count is now down by one. . . this morning's ramblings by a certain someone were just too much for me to handle. . . ahhhhh. that feels so much better!

 
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