Sunday, June 26, 2011

"We deserve better villains."

I was picking up C's toys and books when I saw it.

A wave of panic rippled through my body. I stared at that scorpion, my mind racing, and hoping it was fake (thinking "Who would put a fake scorpion by my baby's toys? That's just sick!") even though I knew it wasn't.

I ran to the garage and tried to put on my steadiest voice, and said to M "I need you to come and see this and let me know if it is real or fake," a little shakier and more panicky than I would have liked. And what kind of weird thing is that to say to a man who is on a ladder in your garage, armed with a drill?

It was real. Suddenly, the title of my blog didn't seem so cute. And fake rubber scorpions became the stupidest invention ever.

I still have the task ahead of pulling apart my son's reading area - shaking out the pillows and blankets - and going through his toys and move the couches to determine whether he was a lone ranger or whether he brought some friends for the death party that ensues when M uses the drill bit to impale the critter and otherwise dispose of him as inhumanely as possible.

*shudder*

Suddenly, danger lurked around every corner and nowhere was safe and the potential for harm was overwhelmingly real in a place that usually feels comfortable. And I'm just talking about my family room. In my mind swarmed all sorts of threatening possibilities and scenarios, not the least of which were helped by my husband's suggestion that we should have an EpiPen on hand, just in case of an anaphylactic reaction if our kid were to get stung.

*shudder*

I hate real scorpions!

[Title quote is from "Whip It"]

1 comment:

Danielle said...

Until the scorpion we found yesterday in the dishwasher, the only live scorpion we'd found in our house was in the TOY BOX. What the H!?

 
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